Marriage - Where Do You Go From Here
By: Julia Solomon
Yes, you read the chapter title correctly-- and it is so much more than just a figure-of-speech!
It does not matter whether you have been married for one year or thirty years; it does not matter what kinds of career or family responsibilities you may have, or the state of your health, or how much money you have. What does matter is that in addition to saving your marriage, your wish is to make it the very best, the very happiest-- and doing so means stepping aside for a moment, stepping aside from your average, daily life, and reconstructing those all-important factors which gave your marriage its initial vision.
Take just a moment to look back throughout the duration of your marriage. How much of its original strength, vibrancy, and all-out enthusiasm gave way to general day-to-day life with its obligations, worries, and routines?
Instead of focusing too much energy on how much has been lost, take heart in the fact that much of it can be regained.
If you are like most adults, you are probably thinking this is foolish. After all, you are not as young as you used to be; and after all, there are also many time-consuming factors in your everyday life which you did not have in the past!
Some of us, however, have duly noted that one amazing benefit to growing a little older is the ability to stand in the present-day while looking both backward and forward-- at the way things were and at the way we would like for them to become.
Regardless of your current age or situation, you can have this benefit, also! You can begin by looking back at the early days of your marriage, and invest a bit of time in recalling what was important to you and your spouse. I'm not referring to how ideal your everyday life was at that time; but instead, the visions which you both had-- your dreams, your goals.
If you were like most couples, those dreams and goals probably included you both together. Perhaps you were both socially-aware, and dreamed of someday joining the Peace Corps together and helping those who were less fortunate. Perhaps you had an idea of beginning some type of
Business of your own. Whatever your particular dreams were, they somehow took second-place and then eventually vanished when you and your spouse began to take on the basic responsibilities of adult life.
Now is the time to assess your dreams-- and when you do, you may be pleasantly surprised to find that the idealistic dreams you had in the past are still an option for you. These days, we are all much more fortunate than generations past-- for even growing older does not impose the limitations as it once did. In fact, there are more and more opportunities opening up for older people than ever before-- careers, travel, and numerous other options.
You and your spouse may decide that the dreams of your youth are no longer relevant or are unreasonable, for one reason or another. If this is the case, you can decide on new dreams together-- and begin putting them into motion. Perhaps it is something you can do ten years into the future, or perhaps it is something that you can do now!
What is the purpose of dreaming, and of making plans to put those dreams into action? One important factor is that everyone needs something to look forward to; but the other, equally-essential factor, is that it will go a long way in re-creating the bond that you and your spouse once had.
Having a dream is great-- but sharing a dream together is even better! And when you are in the process of turning those dreams into reality, you will see that the love and connection of your early marriage is not only still clearly present, but stronger than ever before!
Information on relationship breakup can be found at the Relationship Guide site.
Article Source: http://www.ArticleBiz.com